Jesus Evolves and Manifests Moses & Elijah || GE & KC's Daily Bible Podcast, Day 257

Today, Jesus asks Simon a dumb question to which Simon just sucks Jesus' bhole for 10 min straight. Then Jesus talks about how much he likes BDSM play and how the Romans will give him what he wants. Peter cringes at Jesus' vibe. Then he warns people who cringe at his fetishes will be forgotten when they go to get through the gates of heaven. Then he says everyone alive now will still be alive when the apocalypse comes...and that's still coming. Then Jesus went to a high mountain top where he began to glow and Moses and Elijah appeared to him. Jesus' disciples were like "wtf is this." Then God gave Jesus a glowing recommendation and told everyone to listen to what he said. All the disciples fell to the ground but Jesus said "Get up you hippy dippies." Then Jesus tells the disciples that he's gonna get ganked just like John was. Then some ignorant guy whose son was having a seizure thought it was a demon and Jesus acted disgusted that the guy would even ask him to help. Jesus said "If you just believed in me none of this would happen so just start believing," Both the child and father did and he was cured of his seizures...or demons whatever. They then go to the temple club but Jesus forgets about the cover charge. While in the club Jesus was like anyone that causes you not to believe in me should be shot and drowned with cement shoes. Then he told a story about a servant that owed a lot of money to his master. The servant had his shins broken and had to pay back the money plus %40 tax so do you fucking forget to get me my money. Daily Bible Podcast: https://ge.hopp.to/DailyBiblePodcast #atheism #dailybiblepodcast #atheist Subscribe to this channel: https://ge.hopp.to/SubToGe Join the Skeptic Mafia: https://ge.hopp.to/JoinSkepticMafia Available Deals -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Get 15% off Ridge Wallets: http://godlessengineering.com/ridgedeal -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Merch -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Download CHRESTUS: https://ge.hopp.to/CHRESTUS Get your "Citation Fucking Needed" Shirt: https://ge.hopp.to/citationfuckingneeded "got evidence?" shirt: https://ge.hopp.to/GotEvidenceShirt "btw, evolution is a fact" shirt: https://ge.hopp.to/BTWEvolutionIsAFact ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Discord Server: https://ge.hopp.to/JoinGEDiscord


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